claimed territory

i'd love to be sentimental

and clean all of these hurtful words

with the libations that allowed me

to smile through the dawn,

but the sound of your voice

is breaking all that

is sweet and clever-

i'll just form another memory in my sleep.

something that will allow me to love you when i wake-

to start another day where you exist

breaking, begging, stammering

through your excuses

and sore efforts.

it's become quite a familiar fortress i've built around my mornings-

awaking to find you've risen,

forgetting thoughts of nights prior,

when i lied in your mind

as a carcass

a whore

something worth beating

and screaming at

without hesitating.

you'll grasp at my tired thighs

and swollen lips

as though they are yours...

the only thing you seem to be accountable for.

claiming territory you'll never understand

or sympathize with.

its nearly poison to

miss you...

wishing you were warm

instead of cold...

and soft and quiet

instead of hard and so loud...

januarythirdtwothousandandten